Avoid these 9 common dating mistakes

Avoid these 9 common dating mistakes

Dating is a wonderful time of butterflies and excitement. Whether one meets organically or online, there’s much to be said about the dating culture today.  It  seems to have gotten trickier with issues like ghosting, catfishing, and more, which can make it difficult to predict what to do in a situation. To make this process easier and  be  one step closer to finding love, here are some mistakes everyone in the dating scene must avoid.

Not communicating well
One of the biggest mistakes people make while dating is not communicating properly.  Blurring boundaries regarding commitment has become so synonymous with dating today that many people are only attracted to the initial dating stage without any intention of pursuing anyone seriously. This toxic strategy could result in one missing out on mutual connections and potential partners.
Instead of spending too much time and energy formulating a dating plan, focus on communicating. In the initial stages, be open and honest with each other about goals, expectations, and other important stuff. Not only will this help weed out unsuitable matches, but it will also help establish healthy groundwork for a future relationship.

Treating the partner like a therapist
When it comes to communication,  don’t rush to tell  a potential partner everything immediately.  Oversharing can be perceived as an undesirable trait and is seen as a major red flag.
Take some time to get to know the other person. Establishing trust before opening up about one’s most vulnerable or emotional state can go a long way.  Additionally,  don’t  expect the partner to come up with solutions for  everything  – they are  not  meant to act as therapists in a relationship.  The relationship is only  just  starting, so focus on sharing the good stuff and making happy memories!

Being too judgmental
When starting a relationship, it is common for people to be extremely judgmental – even  things as petty as the way  another person chews or dresses.  These judgments can make it extremely difficult to forge connections with new people, making one’s dating life miserable.
The solution? Don’t be too harsh, and don’t sweat the small stuff. If it’s a boundary or something that makes one feel uncomfortable, address it civilly instead of turning it into a fight or an argument.

Posting everything online
With social media, many people want to document every waking moment of their lives and portray the image of a “perfect” partner.  This  can be damaging, especially when still in the early dating stage. Not only does this put a lot of pressure on one’s new partner, but it will also make one appear overly reliable on social validation.
It’s best to keep  these photos and details off social media until things are well-established!   While  it’s understandable to engage casually , overzealous commitment online could quickly turn bad.

Putting on a performance
On the first few dates, it’s natural to want to put one’s best foot forward and appear as likable as possible. This performative dating, however, can be detrimental to forming deep connections. Instead of trying to create a facade, it’s much better appreciated when one is comfortable with their authenticity and doesn’t shy away from it.

Overlooking red flags
Unfortunately, the dating scene is rife with  people who can be extremely toxic . Although it may feel compelling  in the start  to make excuses for them, these problems can quickly turn into bigger issues, compromising one’s safety.  Additionally, what one allows at the start of a relationship will become the norm, with things only escalating in the future.
Don’t ignore  the red flags while dating to avoid falling for such issues!  If there are doubts about any aspect of a relationship, dedicate time to talk to friends or a counselor about one’s feelings. This will help them see a clear picture of the relationship and make better decisions in the future.

Letting the past dictate the present
Everyone carries some baggage from their past, but this cannot be the reason to create doubt or worry in a new relationship. Projecting old insecurities on a new potential partner could drive them away, leaving one wondering about repeated patterns. That is why, when dating someone new, it’s best to leave these concerns in the past and focus wholly on cultivating a fresh relationship.

Skipping self-care
The excitement at the start of a new dating phase is understandable – one wants to spend as much time with their beau as possible. However, this is not good practice, as it could end up with one’s partner feeling suffocated. It may also cause friction within one’s relationships with family and friends. In the dating phase, try to strive for balance. Allocate specific time for self-care activities such as hobbies, spending time with loved ones, chores, and dates.

Being too available
Piggy-backing off of the above point, being too available, and fixing one’s schedule around the other person’s day can also make one come off as off-putting. This mistake can be particularly evident in relationships when both individuals are young, where one tries to include their partner in every plan or activity possible.
The solution is simple. Take things slowly, and ask the other person about scheduling some time together in the coming days instead of planning back-to-back dates in a short period.

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